Posts Tagged ‘British’

One of the classic futuristic dystopian scifi-ish TV series was a British series called The Prisoner starring Patrick McGoohan. Now, in 2012, Juliet is starring in a re-make of that groundbreaking television series.

Nice promotional materials!

Nice promotional materials!

For 11 months, she was a model of good behavior–only playing in the garden, never trying to escape, happy to hide in the bushes and nap all day.

Happy and free in former days

Happy and free in former days

She even enjoyed a bit of gardening

She even enjoyed a bit of gardening

And then Juliet got the idea to try to climb the fence. I really don’t know what put it in her head — maybe a giant pigeon landing on top of the fence and mocking her — but once she started to try to climb (and really badly), we had to act quickly. First, we kept her confined inside which was miserable for everyone involved. She cried, she whimpered, she begged and then she just hid from us.

She even hid from us on her supervised field trips outside

She even hid from us on her supervised field trips outside

Finally she laid down on her hot water bottle in a depressed heap

Finally she laid down on her hot water bottle in a depressed heap

Bear devised a plan to run a line of PVC mesh around the top of the garden fence and nail it in place so she couldn’t make it over the top even if she climbed up.

DIY stores the world over all use the color orange

DIY stores the world over all use the color orange

While buying supplies, we also picked up a Christmas tree which turned out to be the weaker, inbred second cousin of the Charlie Brown Christmas tree.

IMG_0103

It didn’t cheer up Juliet as much as I had hoped. She didn’t even try to knock it over.

Juliet checking out the materials

Juliet checking out the materials

The mesh fence lying along the bushes while we get the nails and stuff together to tack it in place.

The mesh fence lying along the bushes while we get the nails and stuff together to tack it in place.

And the great thing is that it really did work…for about an hour. See video evidence below…

Then, our clever baby figured out how to scale the gate, using the cross-struts, and she squirmed out through a gap (again, see video evidence below).

Warning: I say a bad word at the end of the video. Turn down the volume if you want to preserve your image of me as a person who doesn’t know any curse words.

Now we’ve nailed the mesh to the gate so thoroughly that she can’t get through and we can’t even open the gate (probably a fire hazard), and we keep an eye on her whenever she goes outside just in case. I’m happy to say that if we catch her pawing at the gate and call her name, she looks guilty and backs off. We’ll put up more mesh after Christmas, but so far we’ve had more success than I expected.

Stay tuned for the sequel, The Great Escape

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I’ve been very busy with international travel to Europe and Asia this month (not quite as exciting as that sounds), so I’m behind on current events, but in the mean time here’s another installment in that popular series of things that just make you pause and scratch your head for a moment. The common theme here is that these are all situations I’ve stumbled across while frequenting public bathrooms around the United Kingdom.

This nifty little unit can be found in the bathroom at Portchester Castle (or rather, in the public car park bathroom). It’s a 3-in-1 unit where you can wash your hands, get soap and activate a dryer all at one station. Provided you can make it work. Which I couldn’t.

A notice found on the inside of a bathroom stall door, just in case your Mom wasn’t there to remind you.

In the bathroom near the city wall and Roman amphitheater in Chester — I have no idea what that low square basin with a grate on it is for–maybe to scrape and wash boots?

Just a word to the proprietors of the Tomb of the Eagles in the Orkney Islands — if your bathroom has low lighting and you also use pink toilet paper for some reason known only to God, then unsuspecting women will think they areĀ hemorrhaging from every orifice. Thank you.

Someone really, really wanted that toilet to flush (the button was crushed so badly that you could only see tiny pieces of the mechanism) — duly noted though, this was somewhere in Corsica.

The women’s toilets, symbolically speaking — Creswell Crags

In the bathroom at the Priory, a pub in downtown St. Neots. It’s a curling iron you can feed with coins. I swear, I have never once been out for dinner, or what have you, and thought, “Wow, my hair just isn’t as bouncy as it ought to be. I sure hope there’s a curling iron around here somewhere.”

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Another installment in that popular series of things you might encounter on an average day in England that just make you pause and scratch your head for a moment…

So if you announce where the money is kept, just how safe is the safe?

Apparently copyright violations just aren’t as big a deal here as they are back home, at least not when you grow up in the shadow of the Mouse.

OK…saw that kinda bloody-ish handprinty looking thing on the wall of a basement room in a castle (I think it was Deal Castle in Kent). And I stopped just long enough to take the picture before I ran the heck out of there.

(No, it’s not weird enough that they provide plastic hand baggies so you don’t have to touch the gas pump handle.) Something weird has happened at all the gas stations we stop at — all the windshield squeegees have disappeared. According to the station attendants, they were all “pinched”. Either there’s a major black market for window squeegees or all alien spaceships coming through this arm of the galaxy stop off here for a quick wash and wipe.

So no squeegees, which would be a useful way to slop water on a fire, but you do get a bucket of cat litter. And a little scoop.

This sign was next to a little reflecting pool in a garden. I think what they meant to say was, “Deep water if you were an stand-in double for the Munchkins in The Wizard of Oz.”

Wow. I’m not even sure I needed the caption for this one.

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Another installment in that popular series of things that just make you pause and scratch your head for a moment…

Roads aren’t big enough sometimes for a single car but that really doesn’t stop buses from trying to pass. (Yes, he’s up on the sidewalk, squeezing between a truck and a sea wall.)

You really have to rely on GPS navigation here to get anywhere reliably, but sometimes they actually order you to disregard it.

They flash up your speed on a little sign and if you slow down to under the limit they will actually say Thank You.

And now from the files of You Simply Cannot Make This Up. (From a petrol station in Greater Yarmouth in Norfolk)

In the local post office, they have kits to get you started on a new collecting hobby. This one was for pocket watches. I mean, stamps, sure, but they’re just handing out pocket watches?

Bear often worries whenever he sees a pronator walking down the street. He’ll lean down and whisper to me, as if we should consider pulling the walker over and handing them some orthotics.

That’s a bird house. Or a bird empire housing development. Maybe a tiny empire..

Found in the donation box of a church in Norfolk near Castle Burgh. What amused me was the titles: The Millionaire’s Mistress, The Royal Temptation and other family favorites.

I saw this poster up in a museum at Orford Castle (no clue why they had it up there, maybe it was about the local theater). This is what the studio wanted you to think would be going on in The African Queen.

This was the reality.

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Another installment in that popular series of things that just make you pause and scratch your head for a moment, at least if you were raised in the Deep South (yes, Tallahassee counts).

We finally found ice sold in a grocery store. It took forever, but there it was all nice and frosty and in a bag. But wait...wait, what's that on the back?

Instructions!!!!

A hair salon in the heart of London

This is your Ikea plate and this is what happens when your favorite black currant jam falls off the coffee table and onto your Ikea plate

I take back much of what I naively thought about the French before visiting Paris, but this still cracks me up. It's a very high end chocolate store next to the Louvre and I really think they were doing a Thanksgiving/Easter egg mash up display

Seriously, why did no one mention this to me in the 90s? Need recovery, just sit here and wait.

But it's a limited time offer

The UK car alarm -- nothing says "Nothing to steal here!" like a Hello Kitty notebook on the passenger seat. (Full disclosure: that's my notebook and my car)

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